Date of Award

2010

Document Type

Thesis

Degree Name

Master of Fine Arts in Writing

Department

Creative Writing

First Advisor

Beth Mead

Second Advisor

Andrew Pryor

Abstract

Upon awakening is a memoir essay that details the free fall from my prime into the disease of addiction, which took everything from me but the one thing I willingly would have given: my life. Instead, alcoholism dragged me on a horrifying public journey that began in a secret place in my mind.

At first, only I knew the trouble I was in, as I began drinking from the liquor bottles in the wet bar of our home. As my craving for booze grew beyond my control, I lost my career as a television journalist, my self-respect, my dignity and the trust of my children, husband and family. Finally, alcoholism took my sanity. A failed suicide attempt cost me the use of my left hand and too many drunk driving charges landed me in jail. Imprisoned and dazed as I was by my explosive plunge into depravity, I had no idea of the soul scraping pain and irrevocable loss that was to come.

That anyone could rise from that point to a life of true joy and meaning, is remarkable. I take little credit for that. Upon Awakening is an effort simply to prove that it can happen, and to explain, to the best of my limited ability in writing about miracles, how it happened. We all have a story, and if we can, we ought to tell it. I know for certain that no matter how difficult the journey we have taken, we will see how our experiences can benefit our fellow travelers.

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